How Old Are You?

Sometimes when I'm substituting in a classroom we will have an extra 5 minutes left after finishing a lesson that can be used for whatever I choose. Often when this happens I will sit down at the front of the class and ask the students if the want to ask me any questions. When they figure out that I mean "personal" questions, two questions typically come up. "How old are you?" and "Are you married?" When someone asks how old I am I tell them that it's not polite to ask an adult how old they are. Then I pause before saying that I'll tell them anyway.

Recently I was subbing in a 2nd grade class where we had 4 minutes before the recess bell was to ring so I took questions. "Are you married, Mr. S.?" asked one of the girls.

"Yes, I am," I answered, holding up my left hand and pointing at the wedding band.

"How long have you been married? What's your wife's name?"

"I've been married 23 years," was my answer, which drew immediate 'wows' and 'ohhhs'.

Before I could give my standard answer to the name-of-my-wife question, which I always answer with "Mrs. S.", a boy spoke up without raising his hand. "That means you're like half a century old!"

I couldn't help but laugh! I told him, "You're right. I'm 49." What I didn't say was, "Thanks a lot! I never thought about it that way. Thanks for making me feel REALLY old."